That's what she said

Saturday, January 29, 2005
3:09 AM

Your Porn Star Name is: Nurse Naughty

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You Are 20 Years Old
20

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.
13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.
20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.
30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!
40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?


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Thursday, January 27, 2005
7:34 AM

"awkward silences" and "UJP people" don't really come together. but we had one yesterday over lunch. over lunch! courtesy of who else, but me.

simplified summary:
fank and maya were talking about this BA student who had made an arrogant remark extolling the business community. paul had said, yeah, he doesn't like the business community either.

And then i said: don't you think we (the media) place ourselves on a pedestal when we act that way? we see other sectors in a derogatory way WITHOUT recognizing that the media IS AS ROTTEN as the other sectors.

frank and paul said that at least we, as students were trying to change. well, yeah, i said. but we're talking industry wide here already. (i forgot to mention that there were sectors in the business community and even the military who were trying to change too!)

frank and i got into a mini argument about this, and then the silence fell.

***
i've been stripped of my illusions about the mainstream media already. it's the product of my thesis-- monitoring how the media reported the elections and seeing that they only gave say, Enrile, only 11 seconds of airtime for the whole election period!!! which made voters reliant on his pol. ad.

i hate how the mainstream media is crassly commercialized and yet still critical of other institutions. well, this is its job. but it just reeks of... i dunno. and every year it gets worse. parang walang effort na magbago.

pangit. there are interviews of politicians, businessmen that i've read. and they say that the media is so arrogant even if it because it is the most powerful institution in the country, even if the media is as rotten as other institutions.

revisit the agenda setting theory. we have a weak state and a strong elite society and a strong media. the strong elite society, who own the media, sets the agenda of the people via the crass commercialist course. it is because of this that i have "removed the blinders of my eyes" (incubus) regarding the media's real role in the philippines.

when i enter the industry, if i enter it, i will have no illusions. it is from having no illusions that, probably, i will get the strength to TRY to change it. baka lang...

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Tuesday, January 25, 2005
2:49 AM

a starts work today!
j 192 exam today!

***

thesis update: i'd rather not talk about it. like all things i love, this is turning out at a snail's pace. im not worried, tho. i know myself well enough to predict that things will pick up eventually. altho by eventually, i mean...

acad update: nothing. i've pretty much left alone my gwa, anyway. i've finally stopped computing my gwa and started enjoying my class and my classmates. turns out, i should have been doing that all the while. i'm only halfway through this sem and i've already learned so much.

"surprisers" the "sell out" subjects, are. (yoda mode?) my public relations and advertising classes are turning out to be enjoyable and intellectually stimulating. more than my opinion writing class with the great lvt. what?! blasphemy!!!! well, how can i enjoy opinion writing when i am devoid of any opinion on the topics? (not really devoid, but...) it's just fake writing about an event, issue which i do not feel strongly about. when i'd have to research a ton of materials, read through them and end up actually *thinking* about what my stand is. those things ought to come out automatically , y'know. from the deep seat of your heart. i can churn out decent opinion pieces (points to the recent post), but opinion writing has never been- just decent- for me. opinion writing is passionate, critical and intelligent writing. the author never has to say to herself: what next?

which makes me want to sell out. i'm coming to the conclusion that the journalism world doesnt need me nor want me. who wants another bitch reporter/editor anyway? hehehe. i don't feel like i will excel in the journalism field. bakit ko pagpipilitan ang sarili ko? baka maging unethical pa ako. mahiya naman ako sa sarili ko diba?

if i make it good in my sell out classes, i might as well go that way. the allure of the corporate world might win me over. yknow, i'd love to play dress up everyday, and have a nice car to boot. may prinsipyo din naman pala sa advertising. lalo na pag si ma'am agulto ang prof mo. :) or i might go the foreign service/diplomacy track. ahh... the perks of having an almost double degree. :)

heniwei.

***

1. never accused you of not trying to work things out.
2. i accused myself of still caring. "gah, i hate these spurts of empathy." refers to me.
3. i AM out of the relationship. the "friend" i was referring to is definitely NOT you. but sometimes, you're "like a lover i couldn't get over." (jeff b. ba yung line na yun?) meaning: wala na pinapatulan pa. which is all, all, all, my fault.
4. apologies seem to mean little when from you. bago magwala, note the word "seem". this is how i perceive it to be. if you were serious when you said you were sorry, well, tough luck. you've done it too many times in too many ways to too many people.

the only consolation i have about being vocal about my feelings is that i don't ever have any regrets. call me wishywashy, temperamental, a bitch, i don't care. small price to pay in exchange for looking back and seeing that i've covered almost all possibilities (forgiveness, forgetfullness, letting go, being a bitch, being pragmatic...)

im very happy, seriously, that you've found friends who stick with you. you are very lucky. unolicited: try your hardest to keep them, ok.

unsolicited: don't ever assume that people are envious of you. it's enough to think that you're good. it's even ok to say you're good, or that you have good things. that's well and fine and natural. leave the "others want to be like me", "others want to have my life", "others envy me" part alone. that's assuming too much.

unsolicited: your arguments and tenses are inconsistent. if you want to be a good journalist, work on these.



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Friday, January 21, 2005
9:29 PM

according to sir lvt, editorials inform, explain, and educate readers over a period of time. but i think there's one more thing that i think editorials do. lalo na sa bansang 'to na madaling makalimot ang tao. editorials remind. they bring up things that would have been normally overtaken by new events.

ito ang una kong editoryal para sa j 103

-----

The year is new and predictions abound. Seers foretell that the Year of the Rooster will be a hard one. Political pundits speculate whether or not the current government will live to see 2010. The atmosphere is rife with talks of disunity and destabilization. There is nothing new.
After all, it the time of the year when rallies are held alongside prayer vigils, food and entertainment present themselves to millions who troop to a single place to voice out their political sentiments, and Filipinos decide whether or not their government stays. No, the heat, tension and overall feeling of anxiety is not due to upcoming elections.
It is the EDSA fever.
Nineteen years ago, in the last days of Febraury, more than a million people streamed to the centers of military power, Camps Aguinaldo and Crame along Epifanio delos Santos Avenue, two protect two officers and a handful of their men from the forces of the dictator Ferdinand Marcos. They had just broken away from Marcos’ camp to recognize that the contrary to the Commission on Elections’ proclamation, Corazon Aquino, widow of slain senator Benigno Aquino, Jr. won against Marcos in the recently concluded snap elections.
These same people came to EDSA to proclaim their dissatisfaction for Marcos, and everything his government stood for: unbridled corruption, unaccountability intolerance and violence. They sang nationalistic songs, chanted slogans and prayed prayers of peace and hope. They slept in the streets, woke up, sang, chanted and prayed some more.
Within three days, Marcos and his family fled the Philippines.
In January of 2001, a generation after 1986, those scenes were reenacted. Hundreds of thousands of people converged at the monument built to commemorate the firs EDSA Revolution, the Our Lady of EDSA shrine. They had come to share their dissent from the turn of events of the impeachment trial where president Joseph Estrada stood accused of plundering the nation. Eleven pro- administration senators voted to exclude crucial evidence from the proceedings. People feared a whitewash.
Led by non government organizations formed through the success of the 1986 Revolution, the people armed themselves with the same ammunition: songs, slogans and prayers. The lessons of 1986 were still fresh in their memories. Hopes were up. Joseph Estrada was toppled in four days. Then vice president Gloria Macapagal- Arroyo was proclaimed president.
The first EDSA Revolution was greeted with cheers by the world. It was seen as an exercise of pure democracy in a time when a significant part of the world was under dictatorships. It also sparked a several similar protests in Latin American countries and started what political scientists call the “third wave of democracy”.
The second EDSA Revolution, fondly called “EDSA Dos”, was viewed more warily. Although participants, mostly from the youth, were enthusiastic about its results, international opinion makers were cautious for two reasons, the first being the 1986 EDSA Revolution did not set in place genuine reforms for the country. The second reason is that global experts have become guarded of the Filipinos’ tendency to replace more stable democratic processes like elections with massive street protests.
The 1986 EDSA Revolution nurtured the development of a healthy “civil society”, says Belinda Aquino, a political scientist, in a paper published ten years after. Non- government organizations in turn played a pivotal role in EDSA Dos.
EDSA Dos gave birth to an embattled Arroyo administration. Because of the very nature of her ascent, extra- constitutional and incidental to the ouster of Joseph Estrada, her government has perennially been under attack. The perception that she was a mere aftermath of Estrada’s expulsion has made her all the more susceptible.
In May of 2001, Estrada loyalists, mostly from the lower classes, tried to turn the tables on the Arroyo government. They rallied at the EDSA shrine but were driven out by the religious who managed the memorial and who were active in the Estrada ouster.
Dismissed as an uncouth mob used by opportunist leaders, they stormed Malacanang Palace, seat of the presidency, in a violent rage which was subsequently put to order.
July of 2003 brought with it the Oakwood “mutiny”. About 300 soldiers broke from their ranks and besieged the Oakwood Hotel in Makati City and surrounded it with explosives. They protested widespread corruption in the government, especially in the military. Among their demands was the resignation of the president and top officials of the military.
With the return to detention of former President Estrada from surgery in Hong Kong, the opposition formed a shadow government led by Estrada himself. The other members are Sorsogon representative Francis Escudero, Makati mayor Jejomar Binay, former senator Gregorio Honasan and former Agrarian Reform secretary Horacio Morales.
President Arroyo’s decision to run in the 2004 elections is telltale of how desperately she needed to consolidate support of her government, or even just the semblance of it. But the hotly contested elections, results vehemently rejected by factions loyal to actor and presidential candidate Fernando Poe Jr., has revealed more wounds at the side of the Arroyo administration. Accusation of improper use of public funds and outright cheating have turned the present government’s image from dubious to malicious.
Come to think of it, the atmosphere surrounding the Arroyo government has never been clear of the smell of instability from the May 2003 attack of Malacanang to the present, the administration has remained under siege. The attacks not only come from one side, or the other side, but from inside as well. First gentleman Mike Arroyo has proved to be President Arroyo’s Achilles heel by being repeatedly linked to political scandals.
This opens up an opportunity for another EDSA revolution. Would it not be the height of irony for President Arroyo to exit by the same way she was carried in?
The time is right and the elements are all present. Like in the two previous EDSA revolutions, there is a singular enemy that can be rallied against. Like the two previous EDSA revolutions, the incumbent governments laid claim to questionable mandates. And like the 1986 EDSA revolution, there a grieving widow in the person of Susan Roces waiting in the wings
Only one factor, the most important remains unfulfilled. In 1986 and 2001, the clamor for peaceful and popular revolution was loud and clear. Is the call for revolution still here now?

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Tuesday, January 18, 2005
11:08 PM

just sneaking a few moments to say that:

somehow, i feel renewed. it's like i've been given a fresh start. this has got to be the best new year for me. genuine talaga yung feeling ko na magbabago na ako, na bubuti na lahat. may kutob ako na maganda ang kalalabasan ng taong ito.

ang mga prediksyon:
1. magandang trabaho. ;)
2. matutuloy ang beijing trip
3. improvement sa love life.
4. maayos na pakikitungo sa pamilya.
5. mas magandang relasyon sa Diyos.

sana nga. sana talaga. lalo na yung number 4 at 5. yun lang muna. hanggang sa muli!

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Monday, January 10, 2005
1:04 PM

pat, this the wrong time to be playing trivia in mirc!

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What about me?

business reporter who hates math. ate to two biological siblings and numerous adopted ones. in love with ice cream and ampalaya (NOT taken together). soul at rest. badly in need of a trip to the beach.


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